The Terrible, Awful, Good for Nothing Twos!

I had hoped that since Anna had colic until she was 4 months old that God would go easy on me. . . . .I was WRONG!  Anna began the "terrible twos" around when she was 18 months old but is in full force now.  Today I try to run a simple errand and then take Anna to lunch. . .epic fail!  She does not want me to hold her, hold her hand, sit in a buggy, or simply touch her at all.  No problem when we are at home but this tends to be an issue when we are going to the car or in a store.  She doesn't want to sit in a high chair or a booster seat also which is super fun!  She threw herself on the ground and began to scream today like I had just beaten her.  UGH!  I get frustrated because when she is throwing a tantrum there is literally nothing I can do and it can last up to 30 minutes.  I ignore her and she just gets louder, I try to console her and she just screams more.  Some days I am really lucky and she throws a tantrum for no reason at all.  It is like a switch gets flipped and my child becomes Damien from "The Omen".  One of my friends told me that 3 was worse than 2 and I'm thinking "Oh My God, give me Xanax NOW!!".

My mother tells me I was like Anna at her age which I would love to say is so not true but unfortunately I know too well it is.  I was so bad at church one time that she accidentally left my sister at church.  I guess it is true that you pay for your raising.  I try to look on the bright side that even though Anna is throwing tantrums like Naomi Campbell right now, it won't last forever.  I hope so anyway.  Although I can picture adult Anna throwing a cell phone at someone. . . . .

Summer Garden

Today I am cooking ladyfinger peas and corn for dinner.  I bought both fresh at a local farm.  I have not cooked fresh peas in a really long time.  I am a country girl at heart who grew up on an ostrich farm.  My grandparents also planted a garden every summer that included: purple hull peas, lady finger peas, okra, squash, eggplant, cucumbers, green bell peppers, Lima beans, corn, butter beans, watermelon, strawberries, and potatoes.  They also had several blueberries bushes.  Needless to say we ate organic before it was trendy.  For us it was just a way of life.  I had a love/hate relationship with my grandparents' garden.  I loved spending time with my grandparents shelling peas and shucking corn but I absolutely hated having to pick peas in hot, humid weather.  Some of my greatest memories is shucking and cutting corn and then feeding the cobs to the cows.  Simple but it was fun.

Thinking of this makes me miss my grandfather tons.  He was the single most important person in my life.  I loved him dearly and wish every day that he was still alive.  He would have just had a fit over Anna.  He was a simple man who worked hard and loved his family.  He was honest, fair and accepting.  He was the only person who ever made me feel like I was important.  I enjoyed spending time with him and listening to him talk.  My grandfather was a father to me since my dad was too busy getting high or just being a jerk.  My grandfather had Alzheimer's and it broke my heart when he died.  I would go visit him in the nursing home and talk to him even when he wasn't able to carry on a conversation.  I always felt like he knew I was there.

People always say that you marry the man who is most like your own father.  I married the man that was most like the person that meant the world to me, my grandfather.  Had he been alive and able, I would have loved for him to have walked me down the aisle at my wedding.  I also wish that he would have been able to meet Dave before his Alzheimer's was advanced.

My grandfather was always the person I could go to for advice.  I remember him always telling me "No matter where you go, don't forget where you came from".  Yep, I'm just a country girl at heart.    

Anna Banana Boat

I came to the realization the other day that my baby is in fact no longer a baby, she's a little girl.  This broke my heart yet thrilled me at the same time.  Sad because she has grown up so fast but happy because she is so much fun and everyday is a new adventure.  She will be 22 months old next week and I'm just amazed.  Of course I already have her 2nd birthday party planned with a theme and supplies ordered!  I love to throw a party! 

I took Anna to the doctor the other day because her eye was swollen.  Come to find out that Anna had an ear infection that she had had for awhile according to the doctor.  And here comes the guilt trip.  I beat myself up for thinking Anna was so grouchy just because she is in the terrible 2's and should have somehow, some way known she had an ear infection and just hadn't felt good.  It is amazing as mothers how much guilt we have.  I basically felt like the worst mother ever for not knowing she had an ear infection.  Even though my rational self says "Well Anna didn't have fever and wasn't pulling on her ear so there were no signs".  My mom self says "YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU IDIOT".  Motherhood:  the hardest job you will ever love!

Anna is talking so much these days.  She also has such an array of expressions including what I labeled her "angry eyes".  Anna performs "angry eyes" on command and it's pretty funny.  Her favorite thing to say is "I wanna go!".  This is also written down in my baby book as my favorite thing to say so like mother like daughter.  Anna definitely has my personality.  She may look just like Dave but she has her mother's wonderful temper and ability to throw one hell of a fit.  Yes, it sucks!  I don't ever worry about another kid beating her up because let me just say, they don't want a piece of Anna.  She's one tough cookie.

Here are my latest and favorite pics of Anna:

Easter Sunday

Wearing mommy's shoes

Mopping the Floor

Future's so bright I gotta wear shades

Peek-a-boo!

Ready to roll!